I... no, of course. You know, Miss Eupha... I see quite a bit of myself in you.
[ kindred souls. just from what little he knows, there's something that feels very, very familiar. ] And I know I would very much say the same. But... very well.
[ he takes a deep breath. closes his eyes. holds the breath for a moment, steady. tries not to let himself flash back to the xianzhou. to the borisin holding him by the face. ]
...The borisin, as I knew there, feast upon blood and flesh as a rite of battle, and for their own sustenance. And so, when I returned to speak with him, I did not answer his questions in a way that pleased him. I knew the moment the sentence was out of my mouth, he would be infuriated, and my use to him as anything more than a prey animal would end.
And, so... I allowed him to consume as much blood and flesh as he wanted. [ of mine. ] Because I knew the extreme pain of being torn apart would accelerate the mara-struck condition - and because the amount of blood and flesh he consumed was so gluttonous, he was immediately consumed by the mara, and it destroyed him.
At least... I am fairly sure that it did. The last thing I remembered was seeing the flowers burst from his flesh.
[ (taair voice) i respect you and think that you are very strong and can handle a lot of information no matter how horrifying but also, there was vore involved
he takes a deep breath as he finishes, trying not to let himself drift back into the pain, the sense memory all teeth and blood and violence. one beat. two, three.
and then an exhale back out. ]
... yes. I... thought there would be no surviving. In fact, I am nearly sure I did not. But... when the disease took over me, perhaps it salvaged what remained - and... returning here, I think, may have healed some of the injuries, too since I...well. Dying is how we got here.
[ he turns his head to give her a small smile, genuine. because, yeah. he could have never returned, or, worse... he could have been that armored thing, lost to nothing but madness.
eupha asks the same question that's been weighing on his mind. he glances down at one of the remaining flowers. ]
...And... I'm not sure. [ man he got eaten the least he could do is get cured about it. ] But... I've already told Mizu, if it does - if I lose myself - then I do not want to live a second long enough to harm someone else.
[ there's no hesitation there, not even any sadness to it - just a sort of quiet strength, a determination. ]
Jiaoqiu said, though, that because it is falling off and not blooming further, it is a good sign. So...we will just have to wait and see.
no subject
I... no, of course. You know, Miss Eupha... I see quite a bit of myself in you.
[ kindred souls. just from what little he knows, there's something that feels very, very familiar. ] And I know I would very much say the same. But... very well.
[ he takes a deep breath. closes his eyes. holds the breath for a moment, steady. tries not to let himself flash back to the xianzhou. to the borisin holding him by the face. ]
...The borisin, as I knew there, feast upon blood and flesh as a rite of battle, and for their own sustenance. And so, when I returned to speak with him, I did not answer his questions in a way that pleased him. I knew the moment the sentence was out of my mouth, he would be infuriated, and my use to him as anything more than a prey animal would end.
And, so... I allowed him to consume as much blood and flesh as he wanted. [ of mine. ] Because I knew the extreme pain of being torn apart would accelerate the mara-struck condition - and because the amount of blood and flesh he consumed was so gluttonous, he was immediately consumed by the mara, and it destroyed him.
At least... I am fairly sure that it did. The last thing I remembered was seeing the flowers burst from his flesh.
no subject
That...
It must have been horrible. It seems a miracle that you returned to us.
no subject
he takes a deep breath as he finishes, trying not to let himself drift back into the pain, the sense memory all teeth and blood and violence. one beat. two, three.
and then an exhale back out. ]
... yes. I... thought there would be no surviving. In fact, I am nearly sure I did not. But... when the disease took over me, perhaps it salvaged what remained - and... returning here, I think, may have healed some of the injuries, too since I...well. Dying is how we got here.
no subject
[ Charlie died, and was lost to them. If Taair died, he could very well have ended up the same way. ]
Those flowers... [ hesitant. ] Does the disease still...?
no subject
[ he turns his head to give her a small smile, genuine. because, yeah. he could have never returned, or, worse... he could have been that armored thing, lost to nothing but madness.
eupha asks the same question that's been weighing on his mind. he glances down at one of the remaining flowers. ]
...And... I'm not sure. [ man he got eaten the least he could do is get cured about it. ] But... I've already told Mizu, if it does - if I lose myself - then I do not want to live a second long enough to harm someone else.
[ there's no hesitation there, not even any sadness to it - just a sort of quiet strength, a determination. ]
Jiaoqiu said, though, that because it is falling off and not blooming further, it is a good sign. So...we will just have to wait and see.
no subject
[ she cannot criticize his choice. she would surely choose the same. ]
I am no healer, so all I can offer are my hopes that you will recover from this.